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Guest Dodge

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And LQTM means, Laugh Quiety To Myself, much more hones than LOL, because I never really fine myself laughing out loud.

Okay Demitri...

 

Oh, and I <3 Pulp Fiction...

 

I said, Does he look... Like a B****?

N-N-No...

Well why'd ya try to F*** him like a B**** Brad?

Well, um, we entered this agreement with the best of intent, we n-never planned for

*BOOM-BOOM*

*gasp*

Oh I'm sorry, you were saying something about the best of intents? Oh, you were finished! Well allow me to retort...

 

And it goes on...

Edited by Spudenater

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Okay Demitri...

 

Oh, and I <3 Pulp Fiction...

 

I said, Does he look... Like a B****?

N-N-No...

Well why'd ya try to F*** him like a B**** Brad?

Well, um, we entered this agreement with the best of intent, we n-never planned for

*BOOM-BOOM*

*gasp*

Oh I'm sorry, you were saying something about the best of intents? Oh, you were finished! Well allow me to retort...

 

And it goes on...

DAMNNNNN. I didnt think I'd be found. Damnn you Comedy Central for airing Person. Darn you. Darn you to heck.

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Haha, "Do a barrel roll!"

 

And guys, please, please stop quoting yourselves. Especially if the quote involves CoD 4.

 

Yeah, and it'd be like me, when I said Guitar hero is for people that can't play a real one, and CoD 4 is for people that wanted a better halo. I'm sorry I play Rainbow one, but I can't stand CoD 4 cause I can run around with a sniper shooting randomly, and I'm bound to hit something.

 

On topic, "well at least we haven't seen the worst." ~TMNT

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"They're like the Frosted Mini-Wheats of death."

-Stephen Colbert

 

"Every fight is a food fight... if you're a cannibal."

-Demetri Martin

 

"If /THOU SHALT NOT USE MY NAME IN VAIN/ had wanted you to live he wouldn't have created me."

-Unknown

 

"Better to die quick, fighting on your feet, than to live forever, begging on your knees"-Unknown

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"They're like the Frosted Mini-Wheats of death."

-Stephen Colbert

 

"Every fight is a food fight... if you're a cannibal." Finally someone who understands

-Demetri Martin

 

"If /THOU SHALT NOT USE MY NAME IN VAIN/ had wanted you to live he wouldn't have created me." Thats wrong...

-Unknown

 

"Better to die quick, fighting on your feet, than to live forever, begging on your knees"-Unknown. Lets hope that doesnt mean what I think it means

 

Freedom costs much more-Dax Coan

 

Victory isn't always Glorious-Someone somewhere eating something

 

I hope no one quotes me

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There are alot of quotes floating around in people's signatures these days. Some are from ASF members, some are famous quotes by famous Generals and some....well some we don't really know where they came from. So I thought I would start this little topic for people to post quotes and funny things that have been said for everyone to share.

 

My personal favorite is one that probably no one has ever heard before. It's by Chuck Palahnuik.

 

"The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it. because its only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. stone crumbles. wood rots. people, well, they die. but things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on."

 

 

So, post at will!! :a-famerican:

 

Okay, I live my life by this quote: "life is a :a-censored: Then you die."

 

 

 

Only three things you need to know in life:

 

1) you will take a $#!3

2) You will die someday

3) YOU WILL pay taxes

Edited by Yeti

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Heh heh heh. Timberlake as "The 'Coq'..."

I think of a hot chic, and you think of Justin Timberlake....... Weird.

 

Lol, no. *Pulls off towel -THUMP*

 

 

A profound quote- Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results each time.

Edited by goldeneye007airsoft

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"I don't know what tm g3 is kinda newbie but will that fit a tippman .45 c02 pistol?" some newbie on the forums

 

1 of those legal right sueing commercials- usually about medication that has bad side effects.

(talking about ATV accidents, rollover bar defects, SUEEE THEM)

at bottom of last page with phone number- "Warning- do not stop taking any medication without physicans advice"

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"You killed him!"

"No.. I shot him. The bullets and the fall killed him" - Collateral (movie)

 

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." -Clarence Darrow

"When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it." -Clarence Darrow (again)

 

"Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in this history of mankind. Mankind -- that word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps its fate that today is the 4th of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom, not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution -- but from annihilation. We're fighting for our right to live, to exist. And should we win the day, the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice:

 

"We will not go quietly into the night!

We will not vanish without a fight!

We're going to live on!

We're going to survive!"

 

Today, we celebrate our Independence Day!" - Independence Day (duh...)

 

Sherman remarked, "Well, Grant, we've had the devil's own day, haven't we?" Grant looked up. "Yes," he replied, followed by a puff. "Yes. Lick 'em tomorrow, though." - Battle of Shiloh

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"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results each time"- Albert Einstein

 

 

"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results each time"- Albert Einstein

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"Baby carrots are trying to turn me homosexual!" -Steven Colbert

 

"I'm going to make this pencil, disappear!" -joker

The quote isn't that good, but anyone who has seen the Dark Knight knows why this quote is awesome. :a-yesnod:

Edited by SWASS

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"Baby carrots are trying to turn me homosexual!" -Steven Colbert

 

"I'm going to make this pencil, disappear!" -joker

The quote isn't that good, but anyone who has seen the Dark Knight knows why this quote is awesome. :a-yesnod:

Oh...........Yeah.

 

"Why So Serious?"

"Lets Put a smile on that face"

"Wanna know how I got these scars?"

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Death solves all problems no man no problem.

A single death is a tragedy, a million is a statistic.

Education is a weapon whose effects depend on who holds it in his hands and at whom it is aimed.

Ideas are far more powerful than guns. We don't allow our enemies to have guns, why should we allow them to have ideas?

If any foreign minister begins to defend to the death a "peace conference," you can be sure his government has already placed its orders for new battleships and airplanes.

All by Stalin.

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Yeah, and it'd be like me, when I said Guitar hero is for people that can't play a real one, and CoD 4 is for people that wanted a better halo. I'm sorry I play Rainbow one, but I can't stand CoD 4 cause I can run around with a sniper shooting randomly, and I'm bound to hit something.

 

On topic, "well at least we haven't seen the worst." ~TMNT

CoD4 is definately not a better Halo. Unless we're talking multiplayer, then. Halo 3's multiplayer isn't what it's cracked up to be. By the way, you can't just run around with a sniper rifle and shoot randomly to get a kill. Only ever seen that happen once.

 

"wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo wo... Lois this is not my batman glass." -Peter Griffin

 

"Never hire an assassina with ADHD." -me

DON'T QUOTE YOURSELF! That quote isn't good, either.... the first one is, though. It's spelled "whoa", by the way.

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One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine, is that the Americans do not read their manuals, nor do they feel any obligation to follow their doctrine...

- From a Soviet Junior Lt's Notebook

 

Reach out and Touch someone - t shirt with a sniper on it.

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rt0065_large2.jpg

 

 

 

Me having a conversation with a fellow kid (im 13, I was 11 at the time)

 

Kid: OH YEAH DOUBLE KILL!!

Me: Good job dude.

Kid: Oh yeah? You wanna act tough? *starts cussing*

Me: ...it was a compliment

Kid: Yeah right you :pain:, I bet you got zero kills.

Me: Actually...

Kid: ITS WHAT I THOUGHT *goes on cussing and teasing my mom*

Me: ...Actually I'm second place in this battle

Kid: ...*shuts up*

 

Oh you immature XBOX LIVE kids, getting muted by everyone and giving a bad name to kids everywhere, you actually amuse me, and, honestly, you guys suck, and us mature players like owning you. So keep on playing, so we can finally get that .50 cal Barrett with minimal effort!

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"We declare our right on this earth...to be a human being, to be respected as a human being, to be given the rights of a human being in this society, on this earth, in this day, which we intend to bring into existence by any means necessary."

- Malcolm X

 

"I would rather die standing than live on my knees."

- Emiliano Zapata

 

"Giggity giggity goo"

- Glenn Quagmire

 

The last one was a joke, the others are actually my favs :a-jester:

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"How about I break that thing off and kick it around on the ground for a bit!" Major Payne

"I suppose you want me to apologize for all the mean things I said to you then. Ok... I am sorry...that you are a little TURD that cant hold your liquid in public!" Major Payne

"I got a little trick that will take your mind off the pain for a bit... Now, you might feel a little pressure..." Major Payne

"Now drop down and give me 25 situps, and I want to see that tummy ROLL!" Major Payne

"You know what you remind me of, that little dough boy. I bet you if I poked you in the stomach it would make you go *giggles*" Major Payne

"Aw, phooey! Don't you ever read any of those stories about little people who do big things? Little Red Riding Hood! The Three Little Pigs! Spike Lee! The Little Rascals! How about the Little Engine That Could!" Major Payne

"Chugga-chugga Chugga-chugga... CHOO CHOO!" Major Payne

 

Emily: Apparently he had a little accident.

Major Payne: Apparently he pissed all over the front of his pants.

Emily: Well maybe that's because he's six.

Major Payne: Because he's six? Woman, when I was six years old I had a full time job.

 

Cadet Alex Stone: It's slippery!

Major Payne: Slippery he say. You think Charlie cares anything about slippery? The only thing he know is to slip your throat. What if this were a life or death situation?

Cadet Alex Stone: But it's not a life or death situation.

Major Payne: [Pulls out grenade and pulls the pin] It is now.

Cadet Alex Stone: Oh come on, it's just a dummy grenade.

[Major Payne tosses the grenade into some trees. It explodes and Alex Stone dives into the mud]

Major Payne: Who's the dummy now?

 

"I never said family don't break up. Don't you watch Oprah?" Payne

 

"The green boys... they wear those green 'tings. You know what's funny, when they stand in front of the bushes... I can't see them!" Dr. Philips (in Major Payne)

 

Emily: He's trying to show you some affection.

Major Payne: I don't like it. It makes me feel all funny.

 

"Be advised, ladies, we are going to WIN the Virginia Military Games this year! You will note my emphasis on the word WIN: Whisky! India! November! GET USED TO THE SOUND OF THAT WORD! A squad that lives together, wins together! UNITY, turds: that is the key word in UNIT, without the Y!" Payne

 

Major Benson Winifred Payne: [Payne has just been informed that the USMC has run out of battles for him to fight, AND has passed him over for promotion to Lieutenant Colonel] General, are you telling me that nowhere in the military is there any longer a job for trained human weapons of destruction such as myself?

Gen. Decker: Most blood is now shed in the halls of Congress, Payne. Guys like us are becoming dinosaurs.

Major Benson Winifred Payne: General, surely there must be SOMEBODY left who needs some killing, or some killing done for them.

Gen. Decker: Sorry, Major. There's nobody left. You've killed them all.

 

"Killin'is my business, ladies, and business is good!" Payne

 

Major Payne: Maybe what he need is for you to pop your titty out his mouth and let the boy grow up.

Emily: Excuse me, what did you say?

Major Payne: I didn't stutter, I said pop-your-titty-out-his-mouth AND STOP BABYING HIM.

Emily: I don't call it babying, I call it nurturing.

Major Payne: And I call it neutering.

Emily: And I call you an insecure, overbearing, psychopathic, edictorial, ego maniacal, frigid lunatic :censored2:!

Major Payne: I ain't frigid.

 

"You're still a **** sandwich. You're just not a soggy one. From this moment, you are no longer turds. You have graduated to maggots!" Payne

 

"I tell ya, ladies, you're the prettiest cadets under my command. I oughta change my name to Pimp Daddy Payne." Payne

 

Major Payne: What's your damage, muscle head? You stupid? You ignorant or are you just plain old deaf?

Woliger: Actually, sir, he is deaf.

Major Payne: Oh, thank you now drop down and give me 25 more for speaking out of line!

[back to Fox]

Major Payne: I'm sorry, Mr. Handicapped Man. I did not mean to offend you. Do you understand sign language? Can you read lips? Well if you don't answer me when I speak to you, I'm gonna put my foot in your :censored2:, is that clear dummy?

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Guest Luftwaffe

It's over 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Major Payne: I'm sorry, Mr. Handicapped Man. I did not mean to offend you. Do you understand sign language? Can you read lips? Well if you don't answer me when I speak to you, I'm gonna put my foot in your :censored2:, is that clear dummy?

Fox: DIR YES DIR!

Edited by Luftwaffe

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From my favorite movie Ronin:

 

 

You ever kill anyone before?

No, but I hurt someone's feelings once

 

A short discussion about withstanding torture followed by:

 

How did they finally get you?

They gave me a Grasshopper

What's a Grasshopper?

Let's see...it's 2 parts gin, 2 parts brandy, 1 part creme de menthe....

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Was Sie gerade gesagt haben, ist die insanesly idiotische Dinge etc etc Blick auf meine sig.

 

Il suffit de ;apprentissage de ;allemand. Je suis bien mieux à ;écriture du français, si.

 

El español es demasiado cool!

Edited by CQB Maniac

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Guest Luftwaffe
Sammy Swift is sexy.- Everyone

 

Sammy Swift is an uneducated fail troll. - Luftwaffe

 

Was Sie gerade gesagt haben, ist die insanesly idiotische Dinge etc etc Blick auf meine sig.

 

Il suffit de ;apprentissage de ;allemand. Je suis bien mieux à ;écriture du français, si.

 

El español es demasiado cool!

 

English, please.

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